The Lonely Finger Syndrome

I have heard this debate time and again, amongst women and men, and it’s a heavy topic amongst my own circle of friends as well. ARE MEN INTIMIDATED BY ATTRACTIVE AND INDEPENDENT WOMEN?  We can probably beat this conversation dead into the ground and still, no outcome.  The fact still remains that people will have their own individual opinion when it comes to this topic.

Ladies (single ladies), I’m sure you have seen it time again – the woman who appears to put no effort or pride in her physical appearance, has a very ordinary job, no sense of style, flare or sense of humour (no sex appeal), yet is sporting the biggest rock on her ring finger, along with a band.  She’s married, clearly.  You wonder how she even landed a proposal.  Then you start to wonder, ‘Did she always look this way or did she just get comfortable?’  And then you begin to pity her and swear to yourself that when you meet Prince Charming and finally marry him one day, that you will NEVER…EVER let yourself go.

So the question is, how do these pre-ball Cinderella-looking women even land a proposal, when there are millions of attractive and intelligent women, with a great career, who are still single?  Are men simply intimidated by the career-oriented woman or is it something about the career oriented woman that is far too complex that she appears to be a turn off for the average man???  Are men intimated by overly attractive women or are overly attractive women too demanding and (perhaps) shallow???  

I will point out that I conducted a rather informal survey amongst different social groups.  The results were cut down the middle. There were many men who admitted to being intimidated by beautiful women with high paying jobs or successful careers.  Those very same men admitted to preferring to date a more “average” looking woman with an “average” job; less headache and lower maintenance.  There were a large amount of successful women who admitted to finding the dating scene very difficult, as they found the people they were dating to feel very insecure and almost uninterested in what they do.  

Interestingly enough, there were an equal amount of men who admitted they prefer to date an attractive and successful woman and found that to be an added bonus.  One thing I happened to notice (and you can agree to disagree) was that the men who do not find an attractive and successful woman intimidating are the men who are quite successful themselves.  I also found that the men who did admit to finding these women intimidating, were men that were facing their own financial or job-related challenges.  Maybe it’s safe to say that, we as women – if we want to find a partner that will compliment our lifestyle – he needs to be on par.  It could definitely have something to do with how he views himself and whether or not he feels as though he measures up.

Ladies, men are not intimidated by our beauty or our success – at least, the RIGHT man will never be.  Be patient and just keep doing whatever it is you are doing, for he will come along.  Don’t get caught up in comparing yourself to another woman and asking what she may have that you don’t, because you have no idea what she has to go home to everyday 😉


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